If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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