summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
