somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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