i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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