If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Naked Twister starts at high noon
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize