OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
