everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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