physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
