so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
