This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
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