in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
