I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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