and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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