What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Randomize
