Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
