i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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