bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
