I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
