dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
