OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
