someone threw a dead crab at me
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
