it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
