I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
