capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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