we're blogging at a bar
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
