is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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