No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize