A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
