yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
