in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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