why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
