She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Randomize