I wannas sexs uuuuu
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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