I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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