I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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