the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Acid is not a monday night drug
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
