I swear she didn't look like that last week.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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