apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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