This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
