Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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