The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
