yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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