party gras won. party gras always wins.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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