we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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