no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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