Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
