the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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