final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize
