So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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