Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Also, beer. Big fan.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
