i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
